Dr. Ali Behzadnia :: دکتر علی بهزادنیا

Once, someone asked me, “When do we become mature?” I replied, it has little to do with the chronological aging. It is the stage when no appreciation would glorify you neither any depreciation would humiliate you.
This stage is reached through self-experience and intuition. It is not learned or imitated. What would be the difference between appreciations or depreciation, if neither one changes the fact. See these examples,
Issa (PBUH) was badly cursed by some people. One man used the worse language, calling him the son of prostitute etc. Issa, kept praying for him. His companions got upset and said,
“This man does not deserve your prayer”. Issa (PBUH) replied, ” He shows what is inside him and I am giving him back what I have in me!”
So it depends what is inside you?

Mohammad (PBUH) was attacked by people of Taef. They stoned him so hard that blood was running from his legs. Gabriel came and said; Allah would crush the people, in between the mountains, if you so will. He replied, No, perhaps some day, their children will come into Islam. “And they did.”
Another woman was throwing dirt on his head in Makkah. His daughter Fatemah, used to go and clean his father. One day the woman did not show up. Prophet asked, “What happened to our friend.” They found that she was sick and in bed. He went to see her and prayed for her health. The woman became a Muslim and stayed with the prophet the rest of her life.
Abdullah Ibn Obay, was a terrible Monafiq. He and his tribe did the worst thing to our prophet, accused Ayesha, for being raped by the camel man who brought her back to the prophet, when she was left behind the army ( This is not a Hadith, is the text of the Qura’n, the story of (ا فـک). When he died prophet made Jenazah prayer for him. Many of his companions did not, and blamed the prophet for his action. He said “This man, while living, was not able to affect us much, what his dead body is going to do now?”
The entire tribe of Abdullah became Muslims, upon this gesture of our beloved Mohammad.
Yes, He had learned from the Qura’n, that we should reject the evil with a good deed. Those who do good deed, do it for their own good and their reward, as being said, is the ability to do it. We should be thankful to those who give us the opportunity to show our generosity and not to expect their thanks.
We have to accept the people as they are and not as we want them to be.
In summary if you reach the state of “Yaqeen یـقـیـن ), in your faith, your image, your total self, then your reaction will be different. When some one calls me stupid or crazy; I know I am not, so why should I react?
A great Muslim Philosopher and Scholar once became the victim of jealousy. Another Scholar of his time, sent his student to him to say that he is “Nothing”. Another words wanted to humiliate him. When the student gave the message, he replied, “Go tell your teacher that I have not reached to that state of knowledge yet, but I am trying my best!!” So you see the difference.

Another educating story is about a man who was praying hard day and night, asking for God’s forgiveness. He was known righteous among his people. Some finally dared to ask him, what was the great sin he committed, that deserved such a long begging for mercy.
He was a simple shopkeeper. He said, “Once I was at my store. People brought me the news that the neighborhood was on fire. I asked if my house was also burned. And they said, “No.”
So I said, “Alhamdu Lillah. Then I realized what a great sin I had committed.”
It appears that he did the right thing by thanking God. But soon he realized his inner selfishness. What about the others, who lost their houses and some, had lost their lives?

If we want people to judge us for what we are not (that we never are), then there is a defect in us (And there is).
I obtained most of my schooling, in my early years of life, from my first teacher, my mom, who could not read or write, but coached me with her touch and brief memos, that became the core of my knowledge, my personality and who I am today. So I remember both of my parents, in every day of my life. In fact I made two Hajjs for them. In every mosque, I enter, sometime in the middle of the nights; I wake up and pray for them. But I have not recorded the exact dates of their departures from this word. Again, it matters not, since they are alive in my mind and are buried in my heart.

There are three important days ( or better to say moments) in everyone’s life, the day we are born, the day we die and the day we are mature enough to share our lives with another human being. The first and last are not our choices and unknown to us. So celebrating the birth or mourning the death, makes no difference. It is the day of our choice, which we have to wisely select, celebrate every moment of it and protect it from all hazards.
I pray to Allah that you will find your choice and celebrate every day of your future life.
AAB August/08